Tag Archives: Life Seasons

Things Are Not Always Clear At The Time

A year ago a friend and I arrived at Dublin Airport in Ireland and looked to meet up with our driver Ted, our navigator for the next 10 days, as we visited previously selected sites courtesy of the Irish Tour Company that we worked with. Since we were both independent travelers and had different interests and respect of same, we could come and go sometimes together and sometimes solo because Ted was at our “beck and call”. It also lessened the impact on our trip when three days in I became ill.

Intermittently I felt fine and not well but still was able to enjoy the rest of the trip until Galway our last stop before heading to Dublin for the weekend and then home. After spending a night at the Galway University Hospital and having tests for possible heart issues, and then cleared with a treadmill test, my friend said: “I’ll be fine… if you want to change your flight and go home, go.” Music to my ears. After a lovely train ride from Galway to Dublin Airport, I arrived home three days early with what I call: ‘found time’. Since I was off of my own schedule, I slept and prepared for a new chapter since my husband was soon to have some follow-up treatment for a return of prostate cancer.

In reviewing the months following my return from Ireland in May of 2018, I noticed that my writing and photography became less frequent; other things that I normally had great energy for were also coming to an end; things were less clear and I started for the first time in a long time paying attention to noticing more, not just of what I needed but what I had and learning to allow the days to happen and not planning so much in advance. I visited my youngest son in Brooklyn in his first apartment without roommates; celebrated birthdays; I met people in my neighborhood; on the streets of New York; connected with younger entrepreneurial moms; hugged their children; listened more; gotten to know my family members in a new way; watched my grand nephew be grand as he turned into a young man; relied on a friend who is an artist and my coach to hold a safe space for me to lay it all on the table and cheer me on when I let things go, and picked up new things to focus on. I listened to simple sermons presented by a Spirit led chaplain who distilled the long known stories of the kingdom into simple homilies given to tired adults (and me) and their young children who dance and play their rhythm instruments during the final hymn … modeling joy for all of us.

As an immigrant at age 6 I grew up in a time in a small town in south central Nebraska where life had it’s own mixture of joy and pain, but also just the right people at school and my neighbors who were our cultural navigators; the retired couple at the library who prepared us to navigate beyond if that was our calling. I have grieved quietly and loudly at the discord in our country; especially at those who demean and use the other to elevate themselves.

After the deepest grief and sadness, I learned to listen again about what if might be mine to do to love God and neighbor … Jesus’s only commands in his sermon on the mountain to his followers so many years ago and today. His words don’t change, we just disregard them over and over again in each new generation with our own priorities and prejudices.

So after an audit and a further paring down of what is mine to do and a long rest … it comes back to what I’ve loved doing and sharing before. Noticing, creating with my hands whether with words, yarn or ingredients; offering insight, listening,learning, encouragement, in life’s transitions … to the next generation of makers, creators, parents, and women entrepreneurs and artists; continuing to get over myself and appreciating the good and the beautiful and living in the unforced rhythms of grace trusting the Trustable for direction in each new season.

Oh, today’s image, is in downtown Denver at the light rail station on a rainy day… beautiful but not clearly seen. 🙂

PS Another new chapter in the prostate cancer journey begins again. We welcome your thoughts and prayers.

Posted in Aging, Blessings, Courage, Cropping, Insight, Inspiration, Letting Go, Others, Pruning, Uncategorized, Waiting Also tagged , , , , , , , |

We All Come From Somewhere We Consider Home

©IBKimage 2012

The place we currently live may or not be where our heart considers home.  I was born in Northwest Germany within a mile or so of the North Sea.  When I was almost 6 my family emigrated to the U.S. and we settled in South Central Nebraska … flat like Northern Germany but wide open spaces where patchwork quilts of prairie and farmland replaced the sea that one is always in relationship with when living near it.

Many years later I live in landlocked Colorado surrounded in Denver by beautiful mountain vistas, and yet as my mother before me longed for the sights and smells and sounds of home near the sea, (even though she adapted beautifully to her new land, and learned it’s ways and language, ) I too find solace in remembering where I came from and am nourished by the sights and sounds and smells of the water.

You all have places where you’ve come from and where your heart remembers  being home … sometimes it’s not the place itself, but the peace you felt when at a loved one’s home who resided there.  Anyway, I encourage you in this busy, noisy, chaotic world, to take yourself home for a bit and “sit with that for a spell”.

Today’s image is along the Eider River in Northern Germany at sunset where I got to be for a while. A river that cuts through flat farmland.

IBK

 

Posted in Aging Also tagged , , , |

New Directions

©IBKimage2009

©IBKimage2009

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s image is a giant palm leaf that I photographed at the Denver Botanic Garden Greenhouse in early winter 2009, using a ®Canon Point and Click digital camera – my first one – purchased  in 2007 to document family celebrations. It was a time of new direction in my life including a recent move to Denver from a place I’d called home for 40 years.  Six years later, I find myself once again composing in a new way.

 

After months of research, and indecision, and agonizing over making few images, and saving money for a possible new camera, I was finally able to name one key reason for my lack of enthusiasm … my now DSLR interchangeable lens  camera was just too heavy and the “bells and whistles” of this model were not a fit for the type of photographer I had become.  The delight of carrying that first camera with me wherever I went, now seemed burdensome with such a heavy one.  Perhaps it also reminded me that a lot of “heavy” changes had occurred in my life during these last 5 years and with the lessons learned, and losses grieved, it was time to “lighten up.”.

 

Two weeks ago, I traded in my camera and bought new and used equipment to support my current direction and interest. Stay tuned.

IBK

Posted in Letting Go, Uncategorized Also tagged , |

Ah, Spring

IBKimage ©2009

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finally, it seems to be spring more than just according to the calendar, and I hope that where you are , there are  surprises in your surroundings (or perhaps your hearts) that seemed so hidden during this especially long winter.  In my first spring here in Denver (2009) I was just learning how to use a digital  camera that I had purchased in 2008 when there were many transitions that were important to capture for later viewing: one son graduating from college, another getting married 2 weeks later, and a move to a new city after 40 years in another.

So, on a beautiful spring morning I walked down to Sloan’s Lake  about 15 minutes from my home and  began the 2 1/2 mile trail around the lake, camera in hand, looking for a picture “to take.”   Fortunately I didn’t find one, rather it found me.  Today’s image is one of five that someone carved on the trunks of large trees that had been cut down perhaps because of disease, but rather, I imagine, to make room for a new playground right next to it/them.

Wishing you delight and joy as you wander into a new season with it’s promises, perhaps also some pruning to make room for something yet to grow.

IBK

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in New Beginning, Pruning, Seasons Also tagged , , , |

Evergreen

©2009IBKimage

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Looking closely at today’s image, you’ll see a small tree growing out of a rock field on a ledge near a waterfall at Yellowstone National Park.  The falls are more famous as well as spectacular grand views  often seen on postcards.  What intrigued me about this small tree, was it’s actual existence in a harsh environment. Think of the various conditions of wind, rain,  hail storm and at times extreme heat and cold; look closely at the small bend in the tree, suggesting at one time perhaps a boulder lodged in its trunk and yet it is quite hardy, crowned with healthy new evergreen growth.

 

At this year closes perhaps we can be grateful that in the midst of our sometimes  difficult conditions we at some point – if we’re open to that – are transformed by change and loss and after a time of grieving and  anger and inconvenience and love and nurture by those close in heart, even if far away, in the new season the new growth appears and the heart rejoices; changed, but with stronger roots to withstand the opportunities and challenges of being human.

Blessings to you and yours as you gather near and far in the coming days rejoicing in the love of God and neighbor.

Joy,

IBK

Posted in Uncategorized Also tagged , , , , , |

“Open Doors Denver”

IBKimage2010

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Open Doors Denver” is an annual  two day event event  in April sponsored by the Denver Cultural Affairs Office. The purpose is to celebrate design and architecture at over  70 sites  which are open to the public over the course of 2 days. It is a delight as a photographer to have access to places high above the city streets as well as walking into landmark building with unique views of of rooftops at eye level.  Part of the fun is a photo contest where the public votes for their favorite pictures.

The door in today’s image was the last one of the day as I was heading home.  We are intrigued I think about the idea of doors in our lives opening with new possibilities, and yet what I loved about this rather ordinary picture is that the door was closed but offered a reflection of three lighted windows across the street.

It is an interesting dilemma re: doors.  Sometimes the door isn’t open so we have to wait for the right timing;  sometimes it is slammed shut; other times the door is wide open and we are unable or unwilling to walk through it; in another scenario we must open the door; and finally perhaps  the door is wide open, we’ve entered and the time comes to close the door behind us.

There are many opportunities and much that is painful when doors open and close.  I wish you friends for the journey and courage to look for the light that illuminates.

IBK

Posted in Seasons Also tagged , , , , , , |

“To every thing there is a season …

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

©2010 IBKimage

 

“To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven …” the writer of Ecclesiastes tells us in the First Testament.

This week brought news of  changes in season for several people of my acquaintance.  A young seemingly healthy man and his family were confronted with a serious health challenge which will extend into several seasons; another is pondering what next regarding career changes; a third is facing continued tension over several seasons regarding past financial challenges.

My wish for them and all of us who are navigating new seasons, is that we remember to be encouraged by the beautiful and familiar that is always with us.  Light in the midst of winter’s darkness; hope that the melting ice brings water for the new growth in the spring; and most of all the love of creator,redeemer ,sustainer, and  family and friends to hold us  in their hearts  as we  courageously blaze new trails  yet unknown .

IBK

 

 

Posted in Courage, Seasons Also tagged , , , |